Family photos with kids don’t have to feel like something you brace yourself for.
Most of the stress I see during sessions doesn’t come from kids being kids. It usually comes from uncertainty. Not knowing what’s expected. Not knowing how long things will take. Not knowing if they’re “doing it right.”
A little preparation goes a long way. And it starts before you ever show up.
Before the Session: Setting Kids Up for Success
Talk to them about the session ahead of time
Kids do better when they know what’s coming.
That doesn’t mean giving a long explanation or turning it into a big deal. Just a simple heads-up about:
- where you’re going
- who they’ll meet
- what will generally happen
Keep it simple and age appropriate. Something like, “We’re going to take photos together. We’ll walk around, hang out, and then we’ll be done.”
I personally recommend avoiding the ‘be good’ talk. Instead keep it fun, focus on the fun and the smiles you dream of having in your family photos will follow.
Give them some say in what they wear
When kids have a little agency, they tend to show up more invested.
Letting them choose between a couple of outfit options or weigh in on shoes or layers can:
- help them feel involved
- reduce resistance
- build excitement instead of dread
You’re still guiding the overall look, but they get a voice.
Personal Note: One year when my daughter was young, she wanted to wear these leggings (that totally did not match) under her dress. Since we are raising strong willed children in this household, convincing her to skip the leggings was not going well….instead we compromised. She got to wear them for around two photos at the beginning of the session and then we went with the outfit I planned. Sometimes we have to get creative, and that is totally ok. Just communicate with me anything your kiddos need or where we are at in negotiations and I’ll help keep things moving forward.
Plan something fun afterward
This is one of the most helpful mindset shifts for kids.
When they know there’s something to look forward to after the session, the photos stop feeling like the entire event. Ice cream. A park. A favorite dinner. Anything simple works.
This helps the photos become a part of a fun family outing, rather than the dreaded, painful, smile at the camera moments that no one looks forward to.
During the Session: Letting Kids Be Themselves
Give them room to move and be real
Not every photo needs everyone smiling at the camera.
Some of the best moments happen when kids are:
- wiggling
- talking
- wandering a few steps away
- interacting with you instead of me
These images might just surprise you and end up being some of your favorites from the session.
Keep the energy light
Kids read the room quickly.
When the adults stay relaxed, the session usually follows. We’ll keep things moving, offer gentle direction, and adjust as needed. There’s no rush to “get it right” on the first try.
This is where experience matters. I’m watching the pace, the mood, and when it’s time to shift gears.
About food bribes
You know your kids best. But in most cases, food bribes end up being more distracting than helpful.
They can pull focus away from the moment and turn the session into negotiations instead of connection. Short breaks, movement, and flexibility tend to work better.
Let go of perfect
This is usually when things click.
The moment you stop trying to manage every detail is often when the magic shows up. Kids settle. Expressions soften. Things feel more natural.
You don’t need to perform for the camera. You just need to show up.
My Role in All of This
Stepping in front of the camera can feel vulnerable. Even when you want the photos (especially then).
My job is to:
- guide without over-directing
- read what your kids need in the moment
- take care of the pacing and details so you don’t have to
You don’t need to manage the session. That’s on me.
Planning Your Detroit Lakes Family Photo Session
If you’re planning family photos in or around Detroit Lakes and want images that feel real, comfortable, and true to your family, preparation matters more than perfection.
And you don’t have to figure it out alone.
If you’re starting to think about scheduling your family session, I’m happy to walk you through what to expect and help you decide what will work best for your kids.
Reach out to start the conversation here.
